I belong here.

When I last typed an entry in this blog, my heart was overfilled with a desire to get back to Spain. After an amazing semester studying abroad, I didn't want to lose the perspective I had gained from spending time outside the United States. I spent weeks missing the blue skies of Sevilla, the tapas of an evening out with friends, and the beautiful language that allowed me to communicate with a whole new community of people. At that point, my greatest desire was to return to Spain. Now, by the grace of God, I will do just that one week from today.

Since I am in the preparation stage, let me start off the year of blogging by answering a couple of frequently asked questions: 

What will you be doing?
I will be working at an immersion secondary school (grades 6-10) in Madrid. I will spend 16 hours a week in classrooms, providing cultural and language input. This will involve teaching some short lessons, but I will not be the primary teacher for any one classroom. In fact, I will be in a variety of classes, from physical education and drawing to English and science. I will not know my schedule until I get there (and was informed that it may change multiple times within the first month), but the classes are not necessarily one after another. Thus my working hours may be distributed in any way throughout the school day/week. However, most Fulbrighters have off either Monday or Friday every week. Hello, three-day weekends! Since 16 hours per week is not enough to occupy my life for the next 9 months, I will also take on a side project as part of my grant. This can really be anything; the previous Fulbrighter at my school had a poetry workshop in her apartment every Sunday night. I will be (hopefully) volunteering at a Women's Center for Domestic Violence in the city. I have no idea what this will look like since I have no weekly schedule to plan around, but I am really eager to work with women in this manner. 

Where will you be living?
Jaja, funny you asked. I have no idea. I will be showing up a week early and recuperating quickly from jet lag with in order to find an apartment. If you have connections to anyone in Madrid, let me know! 

How many suitcases are you taking?
2 suitcases and a backpacking backpack. If I am going to be moving myself across the city, I do not want to take more than I can roll. 

Are you coming home for Christmas? 
Yes! I will be flying in December 23rd and leaving shortly after New Year's Day. Come visit me in Hershey! 

Are you excited?
OBVI. I couldn't think of a more exciting way to spend the year of graduation. I'm eager to immerse myself in the Spanish language again and to see a new perspective of education. This time around I hope to enroll in a dance class in the city, hike a portion of El Camino de Santiago, make myself at home in a church family, enjoy new culinary experiences, and have many other unexpected adventures. The possibilities are limitless!

However, at the same time, I am aware that this will not be the same as studying abroad. For example, although I will get to meet the Fulbrighters (I think there are 48 of us) briefly at our three day orientation, I will not see them after that except through our own planning. We are all teaching at different schools across the city and will likewise be living in different places across the city. And while I am sure they are all very interesting people, I don't want to spend my year in Spain hanging out with other people from the United States. Thus, I expect it will take a while to find my community of friends.

There are also a number of unknowns (Where and with whom will I be living?!?! Did I make copies of every important document that I need? How the heck do you pack your life up for a year?) that make the move across the ocean a bit more stressful this time around. Overall, the paperwork and seemingly never-ending preparations are keeping my excitement from reaching its full potential.
Lastly, I am trying to be intentional about acknowledging that the coming year will not be all rainbows and butterflies. While a year in Spain will surely be awesome, I am also a recent graduate who is moving 6 time zones away, alone. And while I'm sure it will be an amazing experience, I know there will be days when I am lonely. Working with ESL students all summer reminded me of all the intricacies of language that keep "proficient" from fulfilling all the needs of language. Humor, for instance, is the last element of language that one acquires because it involves so much play-on-words. Hopefully I catch on fast because I take after my Dad in my love for corny jokes :)

But despite all of this, I am reminded that, "I come to the end and I am still with you" (Psalm 139:18). Throughout Psalm 139, David recounts the presence of God with him everywhere. In the last Gathering of the year, Trygve made an important affirmation: "I always belong." Because no matter if I am sitting in my room surrounded by clothes and books and to do lists (current situation) or getting onto a crowded Metro in a new place, God is with me. And in Him, I belong.

So, if I am completely honest, I have mixed emotions. Of course I am excited to embark on such a grand adventure, but leaving behind amazing friends and a close-knit family is not meant to be easy. But with the grace and comfort of a God whose thoughts for me outnumber the grains of sand, I expect to enjoy a year of personal, spiritual, and cultural growth. (That is, unless I decide to adhere strictly to the rules set out by my Michigan Dad: Be home by 10 PM every night; don't eat any strange food or talk to men. And don't forget your keys! Maybe you should just stay in your room! Sorry, Ken... not happening!)

Well folks, that's all for now! This is the last day of errands before I join up with Kristen and Natalie to road trip to New Hampshire for Mikella's wedding, where Jackie will be joining us! Could I imagine a better last weekend in the U.S.?

Much love.
In His grip,
Amber

P.S. Don't forget to follow my adventures via this blog by subscribing, checking Facebook for posts, or just refreshing your window every 30 seconds hoping for an update on my life. Your choice :)

Disclaimer: This blog will record my personal thoughts and reflections; it is not reflective of the positions held by the Fulbright U.S. Student Program.